Hey Boston, Julio Lugo here. Yeah, of the 0 for...whatever, 30? I stopped counting awhile ago, especially since thinking about it might undo all of the good those anger management courses did for me after I had that thing that I was totally not guilty of. Yeah, I did anger management on my own. That's the kind of guy I am. Anyway, I know that especially after striking out with two outs and the bases loaded yesterday, and my batting average dipping below the Mendoza line, we aren't getting off to the best start, but give me a chance and I know I'll put together some semblence of offense. Probably not enough to make up for my below-average offense, but hey. Brooklyn!
Hey all, Orlando Cabrera here, forever your hero. I'm batting .334 right now for the biggest threat to Boston in the AL. Still love ya.
Hanley Ramirez, yo. Beckett and Lowell are on some shit right now while Anibel Sanchez is on the minor league DL, so I imagine you think you came up alright in the trade. I guess you did. Sure, I'll probably rack up a second .900 OPS season in my second year in the majors and all...and I've got just two home runs less than David Ortiz right now, but...well, you'll find another shortstop next year, right? You always do. Renteria, Alex Gonzalez...those guys sure worked out, eh?
Edgar here. I'm a man of few words, so I'll keep it short. Dear Boston, fuck you all, thanks for the trade. Love, Edgar.
Lugo, don't you take Mario's name in vain. Mario could field.
No comments:
Post a Comment